My journey toward becoming a peaceful parent was a long time coming: I knew there had to be a better way to parent, one that didn’t result in me yelling after vowing every morning I wouldn’t.
At the time, I was very accomplished professionally and at the top of my game. I was an executive for a medical device company. I worked with and led some of the Top Customers in my field. I acquired companies — the largest was worth $350 million dollars. I co-founded a venture capital firm.
But as a parent, I felt like I was failing.
I remember one day I was furious with my son. It was over homework or showering. Honestly, I can’t remember the specifics. I was yelling at him. And he was screaming back at me. I was so furious with him for yelling!
Then it hit me: I was yelling at him for yelling at me! In that moment, I realized I was teaching him to be reactive and angry. He was six.
“If this is our way now,” I thought, “where will we be in 5, 10 or 20 years?”
This time represented a period of my parenting where I was angry and frustrated. All of the time. The joys of parenting were few and far between.
There was so much guilt and shame.
Everyone else seemed to be doing it right, but I couldn’t figure how to get there. I had no tools, few good role models growing up and no idea what I was doing.
So I set about finding a new way. I knew there had to be a peaceful way to parenting that felt like connection and love and not dominance or reaction.
As the universe usually works, the solution fell right into my lap one day. A friend of mine was doing an interview with Jolette Jai of the Jai Institute. I listened in the hope of learning something new — desperate for anything that would help. Just when I needed it, a miracle happened! She talked about empathy, about connection, and about valuing the relationship and the person over the behavior of the moment. I was hooked from the beginning.
First, I became a student absorbing every piece of information I could get my hands on.
The impact was immediate for me, for my son, for my husband, and our family. Within the first week I felt a change. I could see the path to peaceful parenting. I knew the connection with my son was finally within my grasp. I felt calmness wash over me that I hadn’t felt since becoming a parent.
I discovered empathy and how to apply it to both my son and myself! I discovered a new way of thinking and approaching the challenges ahead of us. I learned techniques to take us away from reactionary confrontation and take us towards problem-solving solutions. I learned how to hold boundaries and use my values as the cornerstone of my parenting.
Today I am a much more peaceful parent, but by no means perfect. There are still some occasional setbacks in our house and we all lose our stuff once in a while. The difference is that I’m centered, calm and have tools in my toolbox that work in the short-term and bring us closer everyday.
I started as a student then realized I wanted every family in the world to know about this. So I left my job as a venture capitalist and now I work with parents around the world as a parenting coach.
Based on the results I’ve achieved in my own family and the transformations I’ve helped to facilitate on the part of my clients, I’ve put together a step-by-step path for any parent who wants the same results in their family, with their children.
This is my story. What is your story and how will it end? Contact me to schedule a Discovery session to find out how we can set you on the path to becoming a peaceful parent.