Ep #224: Connection Over Control: A Single Mom’s Peaceful Parenting Success Story

Welcome to Real World Peaceful Parenting, a podcast for parents that are tired of yelling, threatening, and punishing their kids. Join mom and master certified parent coach Lisa Smith as she gives you actionable step-by-step strategies that’ll help you transform your household from chaos to cooperation.

Let’s dive in.

Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to today’s episode. I am so honored. And truly energized to be with you here today because today’s episode is incredibly special to me. Today we’re welcoming a longtime hive member, a mom who has walked the peaceful parenting path with courage, grace, and a whole lot of heart.

Her name is Jennifer and she’s here to share her story. A story of deep transformation, healing, and connection with her two sons. If you’re in the thick of parenting a teenager right now, I mean, first of all, strap in. But second of all, if you’re wondering if all this peaceful parenting work is really worth it, if you’ve ever felt like giving up, then today’s episode is for you.

Jennifer’s journey is a shining example. Of what’s possible when we commit to playing the long game, when we lead with connection, even when it’s hard, and when we resist the pull to control or correct outta fear. She’s gonna walk us through how she turned some of the most challenging moments with her boys into powerful turning points, and what changed when she began to trust herself, her kids, and the process.

So join me in welcoming Jennifer. Hey Jen. Welcome. So glad to have you here. Hi Lisa. So glad to be here. Thank you so much. Oh, I’m really, really excited about this. Now, before we dig in, and I wanna know your thoughts on this too, Jennifer, before we dig in, I want to tell you all something that’s been true for me.

And for so many parents in the Hive, one of the biggest shifts we make in peaceful Parenting is to learn to prioritize the relationship with the kid over the behavior in the moment. That doesn’t mean we let everything slide. Doesn’t mean we avoid setting limits. It doesn’t mean we become permissive parents, not one bit.

What it does mean is that we lead with love, empathy, and connection that we guide with respect. And let me tell you, when I first started doing this with Malcolm, at the time, he was about six and he’ll be 21 this summer, which is hard to believe. But when I first started doing this, it felt so foreign to me.

Awkward. Uncomfortable because I didn’t grow up with that kind of parenting. But learning to value the relationship first, it changed everything. And I think today that Jennifer’s story is going to be a beautiful reflection of that shift. So grab your tea, take a breath, settle in, because this conversation is one you’re not gonna wanna miss.

So Jennifer, can you take us back to when you first found the hive? What was going on for your parenting life at that time before you discovered this? It was chaos always. I was in the middle of a divorce proceeding and I was scared about everything and I felt like I was doing everything wrong. There was yelling with my ex, there was yelling with the kids and it was just chaos all the time.

Mm-hmm. And how did you feel? I mean, did you feel driven by a lot of fear as a parent? Yeah, I was afraid. I am that parent who is always like looking to the future, right? I’m catastrophizing all of the time. I think that’s the word you showed me and taught me what it was. And I’m always trying to figure out like what’s gonna happen next.

And so that fear of the fact that we were going to fail at that next thing that I wanted, um, which. It was also part of the problem is ’cause it was something I wanted, but that fear made me like almost anxious in the moment and scared that everything that we were doing right now had to be decided right now or it was gonna ruin everything.

So a lot of urgency, a lot of impulsivity. Mm-hmm. On your behalf, which I’m then assume modeled that for the boys. Absolutely. So then you were getting that back in return? Yes, 100%. Would you say that is some of the biggest struggles that you were facing at the time? So, yes. Unbeknownst to me, yes. That is what was, was uncovered over this journey together.

And so, yeah, I mean, it was. Just always feeling like I was failing, like I was failing them. Like every choice I was making was a wrong one, and we were always ending up in yelling. I was always saying, can we just stop yelling? Like, why am I yelling? Why are you yelling? Oh, that’s so great. I mean, it’s fun to laugh about it now, right?

Yes. Okay. So what made you decide to join the Hive and give Peaceful Parenting A try. Because I truly believe that the, um, definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. And so I needed something different. And quite honestly, Lisa, it popped up on my Facebook feed and it was the free three day session.

And I was like, why not try it? I like it. Why not? And you know, I couldn’t agree with you more. I mean, the, I say this, I, I say it all the time. To myself, to Malcolm, to my friends, you know, the definition of of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting something to change, right? So I think that’s as good of a motivation as any, so to the people listening to this, like, think about that.

Think about, just don’t keep, if something isn’t working, let’s not keep doing it. Right. And it’s really hard. But I mean, the first call that I took with that, um, peaceful Parenting 1 0 1 class was I was in Hawaii for a wedding for our neighbors, with my ex and my kids staying in the same hotel room in, it was just the opinion.

I was out on the balcony. It was like 5:00 AM. In Hawaii and I was on the balcony trying to be quiet and just like really wanting to do something different. And that actually ended up in a fight ’cause I ended up waking everybody up in the room. Wow. But did you feel right away a shift? Um, I felt like, like I was being like supported, but I felt so uncomfortable.

Because it was not anything that I had ever done or heard or been modeled in my life. Mm, yes. That was really uncomfortable. Yes, yes. We don’t even know what’s possible. Mm-hmm. Right. It’s like putting on a new pair of glasses. Mm-hmm. And seeing the world differently. I, I can describe it as moving from black and white to color.

That’s a good analogy. Yeah. Yeah. Deep, rich, uncomfortable, but there’s like this knowingness that awakens of the possibility. Right. Well, and you. The first time that you try to do the scuba diving that you use, right. The first time that you try to do that? I mean, well, that, I tried to do that. I should say it was an epic fail because I really didn’t even know what I was doing.

I was trying something different. Um, and so coming back, you know, to the coaching and. Every time just saying to you, okay, I did this, but yeah. Or, and, and I wasn’t very successful at it and so this is what happened. Right. And learning all those little things along the way. I mean, you, nothing changed. I didn’t get there overnight, so it’s not gonna change overnight.

Yes, yes. It’s like getting in shape or losing weight or looking for a new job. Right? Yeah. And, and I think that’s why, I wonder if you can speak to this, ’cause I think you’re a good example of this. You know, it’s why the Hive is an ongoing coaching and community because I, I, I don’t just give you a script and you go cite it word for word and it automatically works.

Right? There’s shifts and there’s nuances, and sometimes the healing is within us or finding the strength to hold the boundary or finding the, the repetition to prioritize the relationship over the behavior. Can you speak to that? I. Absolutely. For me, holding the boundaries that I was trying to set were really hard, and with the two strong-willed boys that I have, if I did it in a way that put it to them where they did not have a choice, it was almost like non-existent and it became a, a battle about the boundary, even though they knew it existed.

Right. So that was really the key for me, was coming back to the hive and really putting in that effort. To ask the questions to you and try again because Right. Trying again and trying again until I found what worked for our family, for my kids, and myself, right. Was was key. And really it was about me.

What worked for me to make that connection with them instead of that fear that I had, that we were gonna do something wrong and that it had to be done. Right. Now what I hear you saying is it was shifting from. Parenting with fear to parenting with connection even when things didn’t go well. Yes. And when did you start to feel the shift in your boys, like your young men, like this is clicking and something is working here.

You wanna tell us about Yes. I think there was a pivotal day where you realize like the effort I’m putting in is working. Yes. ’cause in the beginning I felt like my ex-husband was turning my children against me, and that was a lot of the focus in the beginning. And so for that, when that shift occurred, when I finally realized.

That that wasn’t happened, that I’m responsible for my relationship and my connection with the children. You know, thanks to all of the num, numerous times you told me. When it finally clicked and I finally started taking responsibility for my relationship, my connection, and really understanding to make that connection first, it was like.

A weight of a million Earths lifted off my shoulders. Mm-hmm. And it really just, I remember coming to the hive that day and I was like, oh my gosh, Lisa. And then there was a day where my, my older son said to me, mom, you’ve changed. You know, he said, you used to, um, make me feel when I was talking to you, like it was always a fight, but now I feel like you absorb.

What I’m saying, and that was really when things for me, like, sorry, that’s when things for me really turned around, because I then could see that all of those like times where I was making progress, but then still having problems, right, that progress really does matter and that the kids really were seeing it and that it was really about my relationship with them.

And that’s what I was responsible for, focusing on the, the connection and the relationship and not the behavior. ’cause the behavior, I mean, we haven’t had any yelling in the house. And you know, oh, in the beginning there were holes in the walls too. Those are all gone in this new house. We don’t have a single one.

And we’ve lived here for 16 months. And in addition to that, we were just on vacation and we had our first vacation. Where it wasn’t ruined because of an argument or a yelling or disagreement, and I called into the hive because I was so excited. Yeah, it was a great story. It was a great story and, and there’s so many things I wanna say right now.

I know. But for the listener, you know, Jen is a single mom. Two teenage boys. Co-parenting with someone who parents very differently from her is not supportive. They don’t have this harmonious having Thanksgiving together relationship. Her sons struggle with the culture at the other home, which when they return back to Jennifer, she supports them.

They found a way to be honest and supportive and so. Uh, the transformation has, has just been amazing. And here’s what I want the listener to hear. You know, behavior is communication. And if we choose to meet that communication with connection instead of aggressive correction, we actually opened the door to true influence, healing, and growth.

And you know, when I think about. Jennifer, where you and your two boys have gone on this journey. It really is you influencing them healing and growth, and they come to you with what’s really going on in their lives in a completely transparent and safe way, right? Yes. Yeah, absolutely. And that has been, I think.

Huge for me. I don’t know. They’re teenagers as you mentioned now, and they’re, you know, gonna be going off into the world and I feel that at this point, um, they don’t hold back. They do tell me their feelings and part of why we had such a great vacation was when there was, uh, a situation that had occurred when we were.

Visiting a museum. You know, the younger brother was teasing the older brother, which was something that hadn’t happened in a while, and it kind of caught us all off guard. But the old, my older son, he actually like, he removed himself from the situation. He said he needed his space and he went outside. And that was such a turning point because before he would have just sat there and pummeled his little brother.

Right? So. Stormed back on him. Yeah, back on him. He felt, felt justified and vindicated in attacking his brother. Yes. Yes. It like he deserved it. And so we’ve worked really hard over the last couple of years that we don’t, you know, we don’t use our hands. We don’t. Hit people when we have anger or frustration.

And so using that and being able to express that you are frustrated and need space has to be reciprocated and respected by the other family members. And so when he walked away in the past, I would’ve chased him and so would’ve his little brother. But now we all understand and we respect the boundaries.

And so we waited and we finished what we were doing, and then we went out and asked permission. I. If he was ready to speak. And in doing that and making that connection and allowing him to say yes or no, and at the moment he said no. So we then left again. And at that time, my younger son expressed his thoughts and feelings about how he was upset that he always has to walk on eggshells and all of this stuff that was happening.

And he was like, so what do I do? And, and it got to the point where he was like, I don’t know what to do, mom. And I said, well, let’s go ask. And so I just sat there and listened and I didn’t respond, which IW again, three years ago when I started this journey, I would’ve interjected with, no, you shouldn’t do that.

And no, that’s not right. And no, he doesn’t mean that. But I just as a referee. As a referee, yes. I was always the referee. You, uh, yes, you created the foul, you get the free throw, you’re good, you’re bad, like refereeing or you need to bend so your brother doesn’t get uncomfortable, or you need to not yell at your little brother and be kind, even though he is teasing you and that hurts your feelings constantly trying to control the behavior.

Right? Yes. As a then guide. Yes, that was exactly what I was. Except for this time. I said, why don’t you go ask him? And so we walked around and he asked him and they talked about it. And then we had an amazing day at the museum. I. And it could have been ruined. And in the past we would’ve had to have gone home.

And so really just making those small little progress steps along the way and working on my own thoughts and my own fears has been key. ’cause I knew in that moment, I didn’t care what everybody else around we’re standing outside the museum and people are walking by. And in the past I would’ve been like, shh, shh.

Don’t yell, be quiet. Let’s not do this here. Let’s, because we’re on vacation, we’re supposed to be having a good time. Let’s just get over it, sweep it all under the carpet, pretend it didn’t happen, and go inside and fake fun instead of really have fun, right? Yep. And so, okay. Give us a snapshot into your brain.

Like when all this is going on, what is happening inside for you? What is the yin and yang? What’s the, what’s the voice in your head saying to say, well, I’m putting words in your mouth. What’s the voice in your head? You are not really, because I said it on the hive. Right. So you, you know what the voice in my head is the do not respond.

Just listen. Do not listen to respond. Just listen. Just listen. Don’t say anything. That’s what’s going on in my head because in order for me to not say anything and to not allow myself to spin into that old spiral, I really have to focus on actually listening to what they’re saying so that we can.

Resolve it together in some fashion, or I can respond instead of react to the things that are happening. I have to take that pause and just listen. Yep. Yeah. Pause and respond versus react is something we work on a lot in the hive, and I would bet in this sounds like it went on for at least a half an hour, maybe even an hour.

There was a lot of pause and respond. Pause and respond. Right? Like, because as the parent. You know, I’m sure that there’s lots of temptation to get dysregulated. Like why? Why is this happening? We go over and ask the oldest for permission. He says, no. Okay. That could be, there are lots of moments to get dysregulated, and it sounds like you resisted those by using the Pause and Respond tool.

Yes. By and, and also by focusing on, like, I wanted to make the connection. Not, I want to go see this museum because if we focus on, we’re here to see this museum and to, you know, be on this vacation together and that doesn’t serve the relationship. It doesn’t serve that connection piece. So if I’m focused on, I paid money for this museum and we wanna see this museum while we’re here and we’re all ruining it, then I will get triggered and.

Then I can’t pause or respond or even listen. So I have to focus on I’m, I wanna make the connection. I don’t wanna lose this opportunity to connect. That’s more important than the $60 I spent on the museum. Totally. Mm-hmm. And as a result of that, then you ended up enjoying the museum. That is very true.

Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Said another way. You and you, you were at a fork in the road. Tell me how this feels. You were at a fork in the road. I. And it’s like, I can prioritize the museum or I can prioritize the relationship. And you prioritized the relationship. Yes. Yes. And then you model that for both boys.

That’s the hope and the goal, right? Yeah. Well that is what’s happening because the older boy is learning. You know, I have a trigger, and when I get triggered, I have full agency. I. To step away and gather myself and I can put a boundary up until I’m gathered. Mm-hmm. Right. And the younger son learns A, there are consequences to teasing.

Mm-hmm. I, I hurt someone’s feelings and B, I can also ask for, I didn’t like that. How do we not do that again? Which is agency as well. Yeah, and it, that comes from the um, asking for do overs, which I have done with them for the last couple of years. Tell the listener what that is. Speak to that. Give us the Jennifer version of the do over and tell us like a story of how you guys use it.

So basically when I do get triggered and I. You know, I mean, I’m not perfect, right? Progress over perfection, right? So when I do get triggered, we all still do. And when I end up raising my voice or something on accident or to a point where I, whatever, I didn’t even, I reacted instead of responding. It’s okay to go back later.

It’s actually not. It’s more than, okay. It’s a wonderful modeling tool to go back and say, I would like a do over. I didn’t like how I responded there. And so Can we start that again? Can you say what you said and I’m gonna respond differently. I. That has worked phenomenally. Um, because it, I take accountability for my actions and I’m teaching them that.

I’m also teaching them that it’s okay, you’re not nobody’s perfect. And I’m also teaching them like how to repair because then we go through that repair conversation about why in the first place I didn’t like how I responded. And it opens the door for us to do that. I love it. We were all regulated. Yes.

Yes. And, and, and I just, you know, the stories that you’ve told about the boys, the young men, and the shifts they’ve had in learning to stay regulated, and when you first joined the Hive, I mean, there was no regulation, if I recall, none. The boys were unable to regulate at all, correct? I. And in a couple years they’ve come a long way.

Oh, yes. Yeah. Yeah. Now, this may be a tender subject, but let’s, let’s see if we can go there for the listener. How do you think all of this has helped both of your sons when they do go to the other parents’ home where there’s a lot of dominant parenting going on, A lot of storming. By the parent. A lot of aggressive behaviors.

It’s helped in a multitude of different ways and it continues to evolve. There was a lot of, in the beginning, like things were thrown and and walls were punched and doors were broken, but then at both places and then, but at that house, then they started to run outside and. Call me and then they started to ask me questions.

Hey mom, this is what’s happening, and I have locked myself in my room because I want to respond differently. So like that has been the evolution where now my boys are calling me, asking me for how to help with the communication with the people in the other household, which has been. Very helpful in general with the overall amount, a lower amount of frustration, aggravation, and I guess the word would be violence in general in their lives, and I imagine it helps in the transition back and forth.

As well, because probably when they come back to your place, A, you have a deeper understanding of what they’ve dealt with. But B, you’re also able to be that safe place. The re-injury is probably less impulsive, more regulated, and there’s more open communication about what your two sons need as they rent or back into.

The peaceful parenting home. Yeah. Actually, my younger son, his reentry is only a few hours now, which is really nice. The unpacking of that backpack, we’ve got that down pat, my older son. The emotional backpack, not the literal backpack. Yes, the emotional backpack. Yes, but my older son still takes about 24 to 48 hours.

But during that 24 to 48 hours, we both know what’s going on. Yes. And that’s the difference and that’s the benefit he communicates. He needs the space to just relax and chill in his bedroom and I let him have it versus before I would interrupt it and I would think that there was something wrong, and I would constantly.

Like knock on the door and bother him and, and are you okay? Like, come upstairs. And it was, it was not allowing him to release what he needed to release. And so now we have an understanding. And so, you know, he, he does his thing that he needs to do and then he comes upstairs and then we’re on our way.

Sounds like you don’t take it personally, right? No. I mean, you’ve, and you’ve, you’ve, because you’re pause and responding, you can see the patterns. You’re not expecting the two boys, two or two young men to transition within hours because the younger one does. So you’ve been able to stay regulated, which is where you’re in your higher brain, you’re calm, you’re creative.

You can see patterns. You’re not taking it personally and you’re like, oh, the older kid needs more time, so I don’t need to be up in his grill. How was your weekend? What did you do? I missed you. Why won’t you come talk to me? What’s wrong? And you’re also not letting your brain think that his timing needs alone is an indication that he doesn’t want to be with you.

Right? You’re not letting all those thoughts cook. And pushed you into impulsivity of knocking on his door all the time. Correct. But they used to Lisa. That used to be what it was all Yes. Yeah. Well, because, and I was just talking to Malcolm about it this weekend. We were talking about this in the absence of information, and I was explaining to him that this is how the brain is hardwired.

Every human brain does this. In the absence of information, we fill the details in. And as a mechanism of survival and safety, we tend to fill the details in with negativity. Hmm. Right. So if your oldest comes back and immediately goes to his bedroom, you know, and honkers down in a cocoon for 24 hours. And you’re not observing and managing your thoughts.

It’s easy to make that mean. He doesn’t want to be here. He wishes he was there, but then it’s confusing because over there he’s punching holes in walls. So what does all of this mean? And then when might go into, well, maybe we shouldn’t have gotten a divorce and maybe we create, right? And the brain just spirals down that black hole.

From there, the catastrophizing, the ruminating, it all just gets totally outta control. Yes, it does. The catastrophizing, if you allow that one little first thing to pop into your brain and you don’t tell it no. It just goes from there. And it’s a nonstop train. Yeah, like a freight train. Yeah, yeah. Quickly.

Quickly, yes. In in mere seconds, probably. Yes. Yeah. And this is where I think you notice the freight train and then you pause and respond and regulate back to your higher brain. That’s the difference maker between now and back then, right? Yes. Well, and part of that came from that Marco Polo thing that you did where we had to do the, the counting and the what are we grateful for?

And that was super helpful. Probably more than you can even imagine. Um, I don’t know what other people responded to you, but that. Was helpful in identifying when I’m in the red, when I’m in the yellow, when I’m in the orange, right, or green. So I know my response is going to be if I’m in the orange, if I respond, then that response is going to be tainted by something negative.

Yes. Confirmation bias, right? Yes. Yes. So to the listener, what Jennifer’s referring to is I have created. Uh, a regulation scale, which which sounds like green, yellow, orange, and red. And we’re all moving up and down over the course of the day. The hours, the minutes, you know, you can be green one minute and then start working your way up to yellow, orange, and red.

And the idea here is to notice that and always be working to bring yourself back to green. So I love that you said that about the Marco Polo and I just wrote it down and we’re gonna give the, we’ll, we’ll do that again within the hive. Yeah. And I will say it’s thanks to Jennifer. Yeah. Okay. Here’s what I want to ask you now.

What would you say to the parent out there who feels like what they’re doing right now isn’t working? They’re not in the hive, they’re just a regular weekly podcast listener. What would you say to the parent who feels like what they’re doing? Is not working and who feels like their kid or kids and maybe teenager is slipping away from ’em.

You mean like me? Um, the old you. The old, not the current You, yes, the old me. That was the old me. And I would say that I am so grateful for Lisa and for finding the peaceful parenting 1 0 1 because it is different. And it is a long road, but you will get to the other side and it’s a really amazing place to be.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. That’s a course that I, I offer you inside the hive when you join, and it’s kind of the foundational course that gives you the tools and gets you started on the path. And gives you and, and there are lessons that are broken down into bite-sized pieces that you do each lesson and then apply it.

And then what you do is you then come to the coaching calls inside the hive and we celebrate your success. If you have questions, if you tried something and it doesn’t work, it gives us a chance to course correct and put you on the path. So it’s like you are implementing the tools. But then you’re constantly getting feedback and help and support in making the tools work for your unique family.

Yeah. Okay. If you could go back, I, I love this question. I can’t wait to ask it to you. If you could go back and whisper something to yourself three years ago when you were feeling hopeless, what would you say?

Yeah, I’ll give you a second there. Sorry. Um. A tender question, isn’t it? It really is because three years ago was, was a totally different world, and so I would say just hang in there. Mm-hmm. Just go this path is the path you’re supposed to go down and it gets better. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Connection feels. With these two boys.

I mean, it, it just feels amazing, right? It does. And it doesn’t mean your boys are perfect, you know? It’s peaceful. It’s peaceful parenting, not peaceful kids. Yes. And I think you and I are in the school of, or in the club of. We have strong-willed boys, young men, and they are experiencing the world. They, they’re looking for the boundaries and the edges and what can they test, and who’s gonna stay, show up for them, and who’s gonna stay with ’em, and who’s gonna, you know, who’s really got their back.

And they’re, they sometimes test all of that in the most difficult, loud, uncomfortable ways, right? Yes, yes. Yeah. And I think you said to me to be that oak tree or redwood tree. Redwood tree. The redwood tree, right. Yep. That also was very helpful. Yep. And just to stand there and be that redwood tree that’s supporting them.

So. Yep. So Malcolm and I were talking this weekend. We again had this long talk. I was walking with headphones in and he was sitting in the dorm room and we were just. Kind of talking about a whole variety of different things. And we were talking about being homesick. You know, he is a sophomore in college, and I was asking him so far if he’s experienced homesickness, and he said he really hadn’t.

And he asked me if I knew why. And I’m always curious when he asks us, do you know why mom? And I’m said, no, tell me. And he’s like, well, he said, I have a theory that when you have. Such a strong support network at home and such strong connection with your parents, and you feel support deeply. You aren’t homesick.

Now, you know, that may not be true for other kids, but I love that his theory is all about the connection. And the level of support he feels. And that doesn’t mean he’s always right or gets to everything he wants, or we don’t hold him to rules and, you know, limits even in college. But it does mean that he really sees the value of that connection at his age.

And you know, whenever we, Malcolm and I talk about connection and I think about how old he is. It is so foreign to me because I did not get to experience that connection at that age with my family of origin. I just didn’t. Mm-hmm. And I, you know, I’m sure you have similar feelings about the connection your boys feel to you.

Can you speak to that? Well, I’m, I’m hoping that, um, but I do know from what they have said, um, and from the difference between now and three years ago and just for example, on this last trip, um, when they didn’t want to do something. The, they explained to me, Hey mom, I really just don’t wanna do this right now.

And they felt comfortable with having that conversation. So the fact that they feel comfortable with having the conversation and not feeling that they have to combat me anymore, or that they have to, um, like defend themselves, that they’re really just. That to me tells me there’s a connection there, and my wish is that continuing to build that connection over the next two years from my older son, three years from my younger son until they do get off to college and I get to have a conversation like that with my boys when they are in college.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Listener. If you’re listening today and thinking, I want. What Jennifer has, I relate to her story. I’m where she was three years ago, or I see pieces that she’s described that I don’t have or that I want. I want you to know it’s possible. So if you’re ready to go on the journey to break the cycles, to lead with connection and to truly transform your parenting, then Jennifer and I wanna invite you to come join us inside the hive.

The hive is. My membership community where we deep dive into peaceful parenting strategies with live coaching support, and a group of like-minded parents walking the path alongside you in the hive. You don’t have to do this alone, and it’s where you’re gonna get practical tools, where personal coaching and the kind of support that helps you create lasting connection with your kids.

So you can go over to the hive coaching.com to learn more and join us. Okay. Now back to our wrap up. Jennifer. Thank you. Thank you for your courage, your honesty, and letting us walk with you through such a powerful chapter in your story. I know many parents listening today are gonna find hope in your words because they see themselves in your story.

Anything you wanna, you’re dying to tell the listener you wanna share. Any last things that you really wanna touch on? That it is possible, but it does take work. And it’s work that we have to put in as parents. Yes. Mm-hmm. Yes. And but it’s doable, right? It is doable. It’s absolutely possible. Yes. And it is a wonderful life on the other side.

Yes. Mm-hmm. And I, as the coach and the members of the Hive are with you every step of the way. I mean, you felt a ton of support and still do, do you not? Absolutely. Absolutely. I mean, that’s why I mean emails in the hive. I mean, I jumped in while I was on vacation, while I was driving home from the grocery store because I wanted to make sure to be able to, to share with you.

I really truly feel supported, but also kind of like you’ve been with me on the journey and which is amazing. You know, my children and when I pop in, you say hi. So it’s really, really wonderful. I do think I truly am grateful, Lisa. I I, I hear that and I receive it, and I appreciate it. And you know, I mean, I know I’m biased, but I do think it’s a pretty special community.

And you know, the thing is, is it. It sort of evolved organically, right? It wasn’t like I wrote out this master business plan. This thing has sort of happened as it was supposed to. It, it feels very special to me. I, I don’t know that I’ve ever been more proud of something in my life, you know, maybe being the first person in my family to go to college and maybe having a child.

Those are, those are definitely two of my most. Proud accomplishments and the hive would be right up there. Mm-hmm. Because I see, I mean, I do feel like I go on the journey with each of you individually and then with the community collectively. Mm-hmm. And being able to provide that level of support to people is my, is my mission in the world.

I live this mission and it is obvious. Well, thank you. Mm-hmm. I appreciate that. Thank you. What I love about Jennifer’s journey. Is that it clearly shows us that peaceful parenting is a long game, which you’ve really spoken to. It’s about planting seats, seeds of connection, trust, empathy, and unconditional love, and then continuing to water them even when we can’t yet see the bloom.

And just like Jennifer shared, the bloom does come, which is ironic because. And the background of Jennifer’s, uh, wall is the most beautiful picture of sunflowers I think I’ve ever seen. Like I definitely afterwards gonna ask you where you got that. ’cause I would love to stare at that all day. So it’s funny that, that we’re talking about the bloom does come.

So here’s what I wanna leave you with today. Whether you’re gonna join the Hive or not, this is what I wanna leave you with. As you’re listening to today’s episode, keep showing up with connection and love, even when it feels hard. Keep leading with connection, even when you’re afraid it’s not enough, and keep holding that safe space because your kids will come back to it over and over and over again.

And your peaceful presence is the most powerful gift you can give your children. And Jen, I just wanna say thank you so much. For being an example of that for us today and for being so willing to share your journey. I, I think parents really win when they hear the journey. Other people have gone on, so my heart is just so filled with gratitude.

Thank you so much. Thank you. Okay. Until next time, I’m wishing you Peaceful Parenting. Thanks for listening to Real World Peaceful Parenting. If you want more info on how you can transform your parenting, visit the peaceful parent.com. See you soon.