So often in children and adults, feelings like disappointment, frustration, and hurt are masked by reactive anger. Anger is a cover emotion for deeper feelings, and all feelings need an appropriate outlet. So when our children show reactive anger, we should be using empathy to help them get through it, not punishment.
Reactive anger is often the result of our children tolerating the wounds of everyday life and not knowing how to process the emotions that come up for them as a result. It is one of our greatest responsibilities as parents to help our children learn to tolerate these wounds and work through the emotions that come up for them, so this week, I’m sharing 3 steps you can take when you find your child in a situation that would typically result in an outburst of anger.
In today’s episode, I’m giving you some examples of what reactive anger looks like in children and naming some of the emotions that lie beneath it. I’m showing you how to help your kids dig beneath the reactive anger and get to the bottom of what they’re really feeling, and some tools you can use to help your children tolerate life’s everyday disappointments.
Are you ready to make a change in your parenting? I want to personally invite you to my free masterclass, How To Get Your Kids To Do What You Ask The First Time. It’s on September 29, 2022, and I would love for you to join me. If you’ve read all the parenting books, listened to every parenting podcast, asked your mom-friends and your therapist for advice, tried EVERYTHING and NOTHING has worked… I made this free masterclass just for you. Click here for more details and to sign up now.
What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
- How to build your child’s vocabulary of feelings and the importance of doing so.
- The reason your child gets stuck in reactive anger and how to deal with it.
- How to help your children normalize and feel their big, negative feelings and manage them in appropriate ways.
- Where children learn that there are different emotions that can cause the same feeling of anger.
- How to not take your child’s behavior personally.
- The power of modelling for your children.
- How to encourage your children to dive beneath the reactive anger and see what feelings are lying beneath.
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
- Click here to sign up for my free Peaceful Parenting mini-course! You’ll find everything you need to continue on the path to peaceful parenting over there just waiting for you.
- If you have a suggestion for a future episode or a question you’d like me to answer on the show, email us or message us on Instagram
Full Episode Transcript: